Wednesday, Jul. 01, 2009

Real Life

Editor’s Note: Dr. Cindy Ryan is on vacation. This is an earlier installment of Real Life.

Do you ever crave peace and quiet? I do. In fact, I think I’ve become addicted to silence.

It started when I shifted a few things around in my life and reordered my time so that I wasn’t rushing around so much. During that time period, I encountered the "quiet house syndrome."

This occurs when my husband and three children rush out the door for work or school or other activities.

Suddenly, all the televisions, stereos, iPods and computers are off; the cell phones aren’t ringing and beeping and texting and the house becomes amazingly, blissfully quiet.

I used to be rushing out the door with them, so I never experienced the Quiet House Syndrome until I started doing more work from home.

I had to train myself not to turn on the television or music during the initial, uncomfortable part of silence. But, it didn’t take long to move from discomfort to simply soaking the silence up.

Engaging in regular times of silence is a spiritual discipline.

For centuries, people have been quiet, on purpose, in order to tend to their souls. Some spiritual teachers have insisted that God’s spirit loves to ride in on silence. If this is true in our noisy world, can you imagine how often God must have a little trouble with the commute?

In the summer, the Quiet House Syndrome almost never occurs.

So, I sneak my silence. I’m writing this before dawn, while everyone is asleep. All I hear is the sound of a patio fountain and the early birds’ songs. A little silence is better to me than sleep, so I grab it before my 8-year-old insists that it is SpongeBob time. I’ve stolen silence while driving after I learned that it is perfectly fine to leave the radio and CD player off. I’ve learned to be happy with a wait at the doctor’s office or even in traffic, because I can just breathe and be quiet.

Another spiritual teaching is that you can "fill up" on silence and carry it with you into your regular noisy and chaotic life. Imagine something far cheaper than a tank of gas that allows you to operate peacefully in our fast-paced, caffeinated world.

Psychotherapist Grunella Norris said, "Silence is something like an endangered species … now so rare that we must guard it and treasure it."

Sometimes people who are troubled or hurting avoid silence because in the quiet there is nothing to distract them from the pain or hurt of their emotions. The reality is silence can be quite healing, restorative and nurturing. An old proverb says it well: "Better one hand full of quiet than two hands full of striving after wind." (Ecclesiastes 4:6).

I agree. May you have a hand full of quiet today.

Dr. Cindy Ryan is a writer and pastor. Contact her at dr.cindy.ryan@tx.rr.com.